Ladies and gentlemen, Facebook has informed me that it is the anniversary of two major events.

Three years ago, I met my best friend at speed dating.

One year ago, I got called a slut shamer on social media.

Memories are fun.

Also, I am not Dan’s lesbian best friend. That honor goes to Sydney Stigerts.

Alrught, I gotta do things before I meet up with Willie Travis. See you guys tonight.